Pursuing Veritas

Find the first part of our home building story here

As we neared the completion of our home, friends began to ask the lesson we learned or if we would do it again. While I don’t have an answer to that last question, I have collected some lessons from our build.

First, make sure you have an incredible spouse. I have always been told that building a home is one of the most trying periods that a marriage can endure, and I can now report that to be true. Even when everything is going smoothly and you are not doing the work yourself, building a house is challenging. If you build your own place, make sure you attack that undertaking with someone you love and are on the same page with. That foundation—and a commitment to continuing to prioritize each other in the midst of long days, sore nights, and tight finances—enabled us to survive our build.

Second, do your best not to live in a camper. If we ever build again, I will not be living in a camper next the house. In many ways, our 11 months living in a camper was a grand adventure. We learned a lot, became closer as a family, and took steps toward the kind of minimalist life we want to live moving forward. But I could have done without the regular septic dump trips, the lightning strike that fried a bunch of wiring, the negative-20-degree night right before Christmas, and the lack of anything resembling privacy. I’m glad we were able to make camper life work. But if you have the option to avoid living in 304 square feet with two small children for nearly a year, let me encourage you to do that.

Third, use excellent contractors. Because the county we live in requires licensed professionals to do certain work and because I know some of my own limits, we relied on contractors in a couple places. And we had some great contractors who poured our foundation, installed our HVAC, hooked up our power, and taped our drywall. Rich, Josh, Angelo, and Brant have our gratefulness and thanks. But there were a couple contractors who were, shall we say, slightly more difficult to deal with. So if you build, be sure to find and rely on truly excellent contractors whenever possible.

Fourth, spend the extra money on the professional tool. I learned this lesson over years of handyman work, and it was reinforced with this build. It is well worth it to pay some extra money to have the right tool. Sure, you can make do with that you have. And you should avoid going overboard to spend money on things you will never ever use again. But things go smoother, faster, and better if you invest in the right tool. Time is money. So, get that nicer paint roller, buy the hammer that does not hurt to swing, invest in that pair of channel locks, pick up a voltage reader that is accurate. Those investments are worth it.

Fifth, rely on your friends. Life in community important. And the truth is that we could not have built our house without our friends. We had 24 workdays where friends and family came out to help us. Some people came for a couple of hours; some friends came out when they could; and some tremendous friends donated hundreds of hours to our home. Additionally, our church chipped in to support us by paying for a drywall taper to come finish our drywall (which is my least favorite thing to do in the world, followed closely by plumbing, taxes, and trips to the ER). It is often difficult for me to ask for help—especially when it comes to tasks that I know I can do myself. But we needed to rely on our friends to build this house. And we are so very thankful for them.

Sixth, remember that everything takes a long time. When it comes to construction, patience is key. You wait for permits. You wait for contractors. You wait for deliveries. You wait for that challenging project to get figured out. You wait for inspections. Something will break and cause a delay. You might get discouraged at not seeing enough progress. Something you need will be missing from the truck. You will run to the hardware store one more time. Everything takes longer than you think it will. And that is okay. Keep at it and things will get done. Waiting is part of the adventure. Waiting gives you opportunities to soak in and reflect on the journey. Remember, even God’s Creation was not instantaneous. It is okay for things to take time.

Finally, commit the entire building process to God. Cover your entire building project all in prayer. Start things off by giving them to God. Nothing you own is yours anyway, so why not give it to God from the start? Remember to turn to God when things are frustrating, or you are not sure what is next. The entire time, I experienced a fair number of sleep problems related to worry (especially before big inspections). My mind would race all night: How will we do this? What about this issue? What were we thinking building our own house? Those thoughts can take over your mind. Or you can turn them over to God in prayer. It is tough but aim to pray first and worry second. Give whatever you are going through to God. Because He is the one who will carry your work to completion.